The Mission Call

I was born with a double cleft palette.  That's where the nose and mouth are all connected, and it messes up my teeth and jaw development.  I've had multiple surgeries and braces for 15 years, but my parents comforted me by explaining how they would help socially, and to prepare me to serve a mission.  Every young LDS boy is encouraged to serve a 2-year mission, and I always looked forward to my chance to serve the Lord.

When I turned 18 I had the biggest and last surgery.  They cut out my jaw, moved it to the proper position, and packed in bone from the top of my head to hold it's position.  I looked horrid for a few months, but then I was ready to fill out my mission papers.

It's about that age when everyone asks you where you want to go.  Since you don't get to choose the response is always, "I'll go wherever the Lord asks me to serve", but secretly you can't help but imagine.  I thought to myself, "I'm hoping for an English speaking mission, US, Canada, or England because I speak it, and it I would be frustrated if I wanted to share my testimony with someone and couldn't because of the language barrier.  But if I don't go English speaking I'll still be ok, although I really don't want to go 3rd world.  Maybe France or Italy.  I'm not what you would call a 'camping out' type of person.  But even 3rd world countries might be fun because I'd have some fun stories about some bizarre place like Uganda or Kazakhstan.  Unless I went to South America.  A lot of missionaries go there, so it wouldn't be very new or exciting.  But I'll still accept a call to South America, because then I would learn Spanish, and that's a very useful language to know."

The mission call came:  "Elder Crawford, you have been called to serve in the Florianopolis Brazil mission, and you will speak the language Portuguese".  I was so disappointed.  That would be the one spot in the whole world I didn't want to go.  It would hard to find somewhere worse to send me.  But when the Lord calls you don't reject it, even though everyone asked an hundred times "Do you want to go?  Do you accept the call?  Is this what you choose?"  The problem was I knew the right answer, and there was no way to deny the call without defying the Lord.

That night I prayed, and I told the Lord I was unhappy with the call.  I told him I didn't want to go to Brazil, but I knew there wasn't any way for me to reject the call.  I just wish I had a valid excuse.

Oh be careful what you pray for!  The Lord said "ask and it shall be given you."  The orthodontist needed to take off my braces and make a retainer, so he took an x-ray.  One look at the x-ray and called the orthodontic surgeon and scheduled an appointment that afternoon.  The orthodontic surgeon scheduled us to visit and renowned oral surgeon the next day.  Finally they explained what the problem was.  The bone that had been grafted into my mouth when I turned 18 was being rejected.  The pattern was clear and irreversible.  I would be losing my upper jaw in about 3 months without emergency surgery.  The oral surgeon found a slot where I would go in for surgery in a month.

"In a month I'll be at the Missionary Training Center, and three months from now I'll be in Brazil!"
"Ummm.  That's probably not a good idea.  I don't think the Brazilian surgeons have the expertise you will need, and the time it will take to fly you back to the US when your jaw is loose is too dangerous.  I can't recommend you go on this mission.  You need to take care of your health before you can serve others."
My parents were wise, and they said it was my decision, but they didn't feel comfortable having me go to Brazil with my jaw rapidly eroding.  I found a quiet place and prayed.

The answer was clear.  This was my excuse.  No one serves a mission unless they want to, and if I didn't want to the Lord would open a way out.  I asked if the Lord cared what I choose.  I felt quite clearly that I was not called to Brazil by accident.  I was called by God to serve the Brazilian people and bring them the message of Jesus Christ.  I could choose to not go, but I could not change the fact that God wanted me to be in Brazil.

I chose to go on the mission.  The oral surgeon shook his head and said, "I'll see you in 3 or 4 months."

Two years later he was shaking his head again. "The x-rays were very clear that the bone was being rejected.  Once that starts it doesn't suddenly reverse, but in your case the bone has all grown back and looks strong enough to last the rest of your life.  Normally I would say it was impossible, but I guess we know what really happened here."

I knew.  He said, "I am a God of miracles" (2 Nephi 27:23).  The miracle wasn't that the bone grew back.  It was that God offered me a real choice.  The mission was amazing, the people, the love, the spirit that transformed the lives of the people I taught.  But there were hard times too.  Some rude people, the hard work, the long endless days of rejections.  It meant a lot for me to remember that I chose to serve that mission.  God loved me enough to make sure I made the decision I truly wanted.  I now commit myself to doing what the Lord asks without deciding whether I like the call or not.