Usually.
Sometimes it ends up being a life changing experience. As a freshman I remember my home teaching companion, John, was a senior. We were both single, and one of our home teaching assignments was a girl in the women's dorm. When we knocked on the door 6 young ladies greeted us with squeals of delight "Ooh! Home teachers! We've never had home teachers come before! Are you here for all of us or one of us in particular?" The truth was only one of them, but we looked at each other and coolly replied, "Why all of you of course. You say you've never seen your home teachers before?" It was a delight to be so highly desired. After we left and their dorm door closed behind us my companion John turned to me, "Want to try another door?" We knocked next door, and our first question was "Have you had your home teachers come through before?" Once we were sure we weren't going to get busted we introduced ourselves as their home teachers and shared a delightful lesson. We ended up home teaching 3 and sometimes 4 dorm rooms full of girls. My companion ended up marrying one of the 20 girls we taught out of that dorm building. Ironically it was the only girl we were actually supposed to be teaching. Life changing indeed.
But the home teaching assignment that changed my life was Russ. That was in my home town in a ward with a large boundary. My newly assigned home teaching companion was a new member, and I figured it was my duty to show him what good home teaching was like. I contacted him the first week we got our assignments. One of our assignments was to Russ and his family.There's always this feeling that you can wait one more week. I remember being tired, and my companion wasn't that eager to get going. Still, just like the Nephites gearing up for war I felt I was"doing that which they felt was the duty which they owed to their God" (Alma 43:46). This was what I was supposed to do, so let's just get it done. I approached Russ at the end of church and said,
"Hey, Russ, we've just been assigned to be your new home teachers. Would you mind if we planned a time to come visit?"
"WHAT! Are you serious? Are you really serious? You're my home teacher?"
This is not a typical first reaction. He was gazing at me intensely and I could tell he was agitated. Had I done something offensive? Quickly I reviewed my memory for interactions with him.
"Uh, yeah, really. I was thinking either this afternoon or maybe next week..."
"WOW! Really! You're my home teachers! Hey, um, that's great, that's really great! You're my home teachers?"
"Um. Yup. For real. Say, Russ, do you think we could plan a time to come by?"
"Yes! Anytime! Just say when and I'll be there!"
"Ok.... can we come this afternoon, say 1:00?"
"No. No that won't work. Can you pick a different time?"
"Uh - like 3:00, or 7:00?"
"Nope. No - can you pick a different day?"
"Uhhhhh. Would Tuesday evening work?"
"No, that won't do. When else could you come?"
I looked at my companion. I thought I knew Russ as a sensible guy, but his reaction was a little extreme on the eager side, and now it was extreme on the hesitant side. Finally I offered Thursday afternoon, and Russ ecstatically said that was perfect and he was looking forward to it.
Later my companion (who hadn't done much home teaching before he was baptized) asked if that was typical. I told him that was definitely an unusual reaction, but it was much better than trying to home teach someone who didn't like our visits. I couldn't tell if he was being funny or just having a strange day, but I could roll with either one.
On Thursday we went to Russ' house. He got his wife and sons in the living room, and we shared a lesson. He made sure his two teenage boys weren't playing or reading, and everyone was very nice. It was a good visit. As we left he escorted us out and asked us when we planned on coming back. I figured in a month, but if he liked our visits we could swing by earlier, say in two weeks. He said that was great, he loved having us come, and we set up an appointment two weeks later. I asked him if he previous home teachers came very often. Turns out they never came. At least that explained his surprise when we wanted to come visit.
At this point something interesting happened. You see, I've taught families that didn't really like our visits, and they are always hard to call. You just know you're bugging them. I've taught families that were indifferent, and it's hard to find the time. But Russ loved it when we came. He thanked us repeatedly, and he paid careful attention. Sometimes we would try to set up a time to visit and he would tell us no, but then he would offer suggestions until we found a time that would work. Because Russ was so happy to have us visit we loved setting up appointments and visiting with him. Often after our lesson he would bear a strong heartfelt testimony.
We became friends, and my companion became more eager to be part of the home teaching. We would plan regular times to visit, and it was more than once a month. Sometimes when I felt like it I'd swing by Russ' house just to see how he was doing. His sons put up with us, his wife was quiet, but Russ participated in the lessons. Because Russ was happy to see us we didn't feel annoyed when we needed to call him, I found myself putting a little extra time into preparing the lesson, and it wasn't hard to remember to do my home teaching. The "chore" of home teaching became a joy.
One day my companion and I were visiting a different family, and we decided to stop by Russ' house to see how he was doing. We found him outside working on his car. We chatted for a bit, and he said he would invite us in to give a lesson but his sons were gone. He said he always tried real hard to make sure we came when he knew his sons were home. That was why he sometimes said no to our appointments. Then he told me an astounding story.
He told us that there had been a time when he wasn't really close the church. He was interested in other things, and didn't attend church for a while. His sons were little, and he figured it wasn't a big deal. He had always planned on going back to church - there was just other things he was doing at the time. Then one day he realized his sons weren't exactly little anymore. Time had gone fast and he started to see what he was missing. He yearned for the spirit and returned to regular church attendance. As he saw what he had been missing his spirituality grew.
He gained a strong testimony and had learned the hard way how to keep close the Lord. But by then there was consequences. His sons had decided they didn't want to go to church every week.
As they went through their teenage years Russ became more spiritually sensitive, and his sons became more rebellious. As Russ tried to encourage his sons to be more faithful they started to fight harder and argue more. His wife wasn't the type to fight, and so the sons became less active while Russ became a steadfast pillar in the ward.
Finally he was hitting his breaking point. Every Sunday turned into a fight, and young men's activities became a battle ground. Russ was trying to teach the truths he had learned, but his sons had stopped listening. Finally one Sunday morning he tried harder than ever to get his boys to church. They slipped out of the house and disappeared. Exhausted Russ wasn't sure if he could continue. On his way to church he stopped and prayed.
He told Heavenly Father that he cared about his sons, but he didn't want to always argue with them. He told God that he was tired and if he didn't get some help he would have to stop and give up on teaching his boys. He loved them, but he didn't want to be the only one who was always lecturing them. He prayed that if God would send him help he would keep trying - otherwise today was the end.
After church we told Russ we were his home teachers. He wanted us to come that afternoon, but he realized his boys would probably not come home until late at night. Tuesday his sons worked, but Thursday they should be home. He told us how much he appreciated us coming into his home and saying things he wanted his sons to hear. Since we were not the dad they didn't argue with us, and while they appeared to not be paying attention, at least they didn't storm off and leave. It was the extra help Russ needed, and now he could testify in front of his sons without it being confrontational to them. I would love to say that we brought his sons back to full activity. Later I heard one of his sons became active in the single's ward - likely because of a sister. But the miracle was that when Russ needed help the Lord sent him home teachers. When the scripture says "mine angels [shall be] round about you, to bear you up" (D&C 84:88) sometimes that refers to home teachers. What if I had decided to not worry about it? What if I had told myself it could wait until next week? Since that day I have tried to promise myself I would never let home teaching take a back seat in my priority list. Even when most visits follow a typical pattern, one of them might be an answer to prayer.
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